difficulty

why are some of the simplest things the ones that get complicated so much?

at least that is the story of my life.

even composing this blog is difficult...what to put, what is too much to put. constantly second-guessing myself... and yet the thing that brings me back to simplicity is a nice tune that gets me introspective, course it takes the mood, the want...but the tune definitely helps.

still, peace eludes me. the constant war within that only gets shoved farther, never really being addressed.

sometimes i wonder if it will take an army to keep me on track. but an army always begins with one right?

travels

just so you know, i am back in texas...specifically tyler this week. i have left my home and great friends in kentucky and arrived early tuesday mornin. still kinda getting settled...be waiting for pics and stuff.


hope everyone had a wonderful thanksgiving

most of things

the challenge, the fight, maybe that is what entices me so much. to have someone push you, encourage you, challenge, uplift, test, soothe, spice, and laugh.

friends

the more time i spend by myself, the more i continue to reaffirm that i am definitely a group type person. one who feed off energy, but also need the group at times to drive and to get me to think of what i like and miss and want.

...but i say that on this side of it, and yet with corky and family movin in it is nice to have someone on property to joke with and chat with after patrick left.

still wonder if i am there yet...i mean i know i am not, but i wonder if i am far enough along...cause somethings got to happen one way or another.

game day

well, it has been a good weekend with good groups and a new little toy which i'll post pictures sometime.

just watchin some of the games on today...finished watchin the record-breaking tennessee-texas game. most 4th quarter points scored in franchise history, most field goals by a kicker in NFL history...with a game winning field goal by tennessee.

saw elizabeth: the golden age with jordan smith the other day...it was a good one. went to paducah, ate at steak and shake, watched the movie, and came out to pouring rain...fun

doin good here in KY, specially after that storm that came through on thursday.

not much goin on

hero

"The real hero is always a hero by mistake; he dreams of being an honest coward like everybody else."
-Umberto Eco

but it is the hero who rises to the occasion in which he finds himself.


deep anonymity doesnt hold much for me. who doesnt crave attention...joy in seeing others recognize you...and smile.

those that crave anonymity are those that already have someone or something that they consider themselves fulfilled. what they do from there on out is strictly for the joy of it...not because they need to, not because they crave the attention, but because they can.

what is it so much that i crave, that i miss, that i am missing, that i reminisce about, and yet i still hold out for something else.